you'll never miss what you've never had

№ ‽

2012-01-20T23:01:00.002+08:00

current ♥:
bright orange
gold
glitter
denim
shocking pink
boots
+

heard this tune in a restaurant/bar and fell in love.

☮

2011-12-24T13:35:00.004+08:00

back from beautiful Perth swimmin' surfin' chillin'.

oh i miss the crazy yummy food.

Merry Christmas?

☠

nineteen

2011-12-08T15:27:00.001+08:00

(L)

new

2011-12-08T11:55:00.000+08:00

ahem ahem

2011-12-03T15:55:00.000+08:00

3rd day of post A's and i feel somewhat... the same. Either i'm not used to the feeling of freedom yet, or i've actually freed myself way before this.

It keeps raining. At the moment i'm sitting in bed under my blankie with my nose stuffed with a ball of tissue, doors and windows closed, just so the wind will leave me and my hair alone. Talking about hair, i'm gonna cut it, dye it, i need change i guess! Which was why i tried fixing up this place buttah, its kinda.. messy. Oh well, i could deal with messy. You should see whats lying around me now.. stacks and stacks of clothes on the clothe stand, books, notes (what notes? study? what'sit?*sniggers), the stupid whiteboard standing there looking all big and shizz, and why is my bath towel hanging on top of it?? Basically, a mezz.

Time to sort things, maaayybe after the rain stops(which is nevaaaaaaaa).
Hi you, i may or may not know you but i'm not sure what you're looking for over here in this dead dusty place... but! come back in a while more, when my life officially begins, i might even sing and dance for you.
hehe /blows kisses

BIG FAT JIGGLY KISSES from BIG FAT JIGGLY ME.

moments

2011-11-12T17:55:00.003+08:00

company

2011-10-18T18:45:00.000+08:00

right now

2011-10-13T21:13:00.002+08:00

Sunday afternoon

2011-09-25T13:26:00.000+08:00

everything will be alright.

....

2011-09-22T16:34:00.000+08:00

Currently---
On the bus home, feeling extremely restless and fidgety at the same time.
This indian kid won't stop singing his bollywood tunes and jumping around. It's giving me a headache. I wouldn't mind if he's.. Cute. But no.

This ride feels like a journey to narnia. Only not through a wardrobe
Oh yay, home!

wuzzy

2011-09-17T01:58:00.001+08:00

i'd like to believe and experience it sometime.
beautiful even if it's temporary.

but first i need to get my life straight.

child

2011-09-12T18:37:00.003+08:00

took a nap earlier at noon after my math paper, i wasn't close to asleep at all despite the insomnia i had the night before. i got up after an hour feeling terrible, tragic, yucky, bluek (SYNTAX YALL), ran downstairs to look for my mom but she already left for work. no hug. the house is pretty empty nowadays, adam's in vietnam (ikr) and parents are out at work everyday. without the awful singing- adam- and the endless nagging- momma, this place feels peacefully dead. i don't like dead, for now, because i am so not alive right now.
felt drunk while doing math, i don't even know if the things i wrote were correct. i tried.

lit tomorrow.
i had better sleep tonight. or i'll be writing crap like this.

i miss.

here we go again

2011-09-10T15:11:00.000+08:00

gorgy

2011-09-04T00:10:00.001+08:00

Leighton makes me feel exceptionally girly, i might want to wear a dress out tomorrow. we'll see.
for now, i have a craving for BUTTER (i know, how weird and UN-girly). So imma go get me some bread now.
I'm such a pointless being.

ticktockticktocktick

2011-08-28T15:20:00.003+08:00

"Since everything is a reflection of our minds, everything can be changed by our minds."

— Buddha

Woke up feeling like i need to do something with my life but then again that's the same thought i have every morning. and i'm still the same. Buddha don't lie to me///////

I tried, but it all seems like stupid dreams i have in the middle of the night.. i guess i'm just really tired.

tired tried tired tried tired tried tired tried tired tried tried treid treid tredi rteid diert dietr die die die die die.

can you imagine yourself 20 years from now? do you feel like dying? i do. i wake up everyday as the same bloody person, by 39, asdgjsdfjsdfjsbdjf i'm the same bloody nathalie and that's scary. you'll probably live for 80 years but really, 20 years is enough. anything after that is just repetition of the same things in different forms. you'll think the same, you'll do the same. Oh yes you're growing.. yeah sure, fatter maybe. Intellectually? probably. but only so that you can dodge more shit life throws at you.

i'm sorry.

i'm drunk.

so are youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.

GOOD DAY.

(the quote makes more sense now)

c o l d

2011-08-27T18:54:00.000+08:00

stomach feels weird.
in my hoodie in the dark, curled up in bed with my blankie. I don't wanna feel.

tuesday

2011-08-16T12:22:00.003+08:00

from my blog stats.

Found it really funny, what in pants were you searching for?! I hope both of the searches are non-related because if not.. i think it could be clue for some murder case. Murderer hates--smelly teacher-- drowned him, turned psycho-- wants to get him back--
which totally explains everything.. right? no?

Anyway, hello you. School's really draining me into.. nothing now. I'm totally deprived of brain juice after the stupid literature themes proj. that i finally am done with, at 230AM last night. Took me two full days (and i mean FULL) to complete it.
OK sorry i got distracted by the MILLIONS OF ANTS RANDOMLY APPEARING AROUND ME OVER THE PAST FEW WEEKS. I've cleaned my room so thoroughly i honestly have no idea where all these creatures are from. One day when i'm bored i'll probably stalk one ant and see where the goddamn nest is.

*$ lurrvin' tomorrow after school for some yummy-mugging with old pals. Hopefully I'll get all that i need to know into my super-absorbent-spongey-brain. (it's called positive thinking..)

Jen and I are having a splendid conversation on fb-chat now, she keeps updating me on the weirdo that's sitting next to her in the library. apparently he laughs and talks to himself, dances, and just in.. farted real loud.

i'm gonna go grab another cup of tea. Goodbye, good day!

life at this point

2011-08-06T20:35:00.000+08:00

This is how i look like nowadays. LOOK AT MY GINORMOUS EYE-BAGS. wooweet.

people say pooja and I look like sisters. I say we're chindian twins, I just got more of the chinese part and she the indian.
(school really really really sucks right now. teachers somehow make you feel bad about yourself...)

i am doing math

2011-08-01T22:10:00.000+08:00

i will scooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooore.
goodbye you. don't be pissed at me please.
i'll be back.

(Jun Hasegawa, my girl eyecandy)

unstable

2011-07-18T21:40:00.000+08:00

crestfallen

2011-07-15T22:12:00.002+08:00

i miss feeling good about myself.

i will again. just wait.

June

2011-07-10T20:12:00.000+08:00

credits: fetishforshoess

those were during the start of june holidays where pooja and i didn't really give a damn about exams. As you can see..

papers might be flowing back to my hands next week and i'll uhm.. embrace them with warm... hugs? I failed bio by half a mark. and they decided not to round up. oh well. what am i to expect when all i did was to cram a whole syllabus in one night. (or maybe half.. to be exact)

school...........
will i really miss it when i'm done with it?
can't wait. i had enough of annoying teachers, the factory, disappointing results.. i could go on and on and on and on and onnnnnnnnnnnnn but its time for dinner. and maybe after that i'll try to sit down and do some biology.

when is the nerdy ghost gonna possess me..

Thoughts just before bed

2011-07-06T21:35:00.001+08:00

It's 9:19 and I'm all tucked in bed. Blurry vision without my contacts I can still see fuzzy yellow orange lights from the condo right outside my window. Can't sleep yet, couldn't find my drowsy flu med. Had a flu going on for a few days now.. Possibly got it from Jennifer when we shared a cup at the club last Saturday night.. Right now I'm breathing fine with my nose just that I kinda sorta lost my sense of smell. Again. Realized it during dinner when everything was tasteless, even the whole spoon of salted vegetables I stuffed into my mouth. Confirmed it after almost pouring perfume into my nose.
What if you lose your sense of smell and taste? Will it be sad? You'll never get tempted by food just because it tastes so good. You won't realize that there's funky smell around you.

Oh btw, I've had this thing happen to me around last year. I couldn't smell and taste properly for about a week. One day my mom came into my room with the laundry and I asked her "eww what's that smell?!" and then realized I could smell again. Which... Then lead to me crazily sniffing all the smelly clothes she brought in.. With glee. So. I guess it's not a good thing if you can't smell or taste. Right now I can't see properly either. I feel almost deadly.

I better stop tapping on this small iPod screen before my thumbs get numb and I lose my sense of touch.

Neighbors' dog should really stop barking.

I feel sleepy now.
Goodnight you.

truestory

2011-07-04T00:18:00.000+08:00

when someone looks at your playlist~

They go…

You go…

2011-07-03T23:12:00.000+08:00

right now: crazy h a p p y.

i don't really have much to say these days..
so

bye-yeom!

////////

2011-06-25T20:32:00.000+08:00

shdsipdhfpuisafusdnfjakshdfinasndnfasdnfjasdfjaojsfmwe8ur89y&Y*wndjipse00w4884089ufnhjdglkaugrlhjf yrubosghpaieurtyaoijrtagwyubaowenfkd

halp :'(

/ignoreme

2011-06-24T16:45:00.001+08:00

-_____________-

2011-06-22T09:55:00.001+08:00

was supposed to be up at only 930AM but bro's stereos woke me up at 800AM instead. now i have watery eyes that need more sleep but my brain is much to active for me to fall back to bed due to those repetitive club beats.

i tend to get songs stuck in my head a lot. and very easily. it just keeps going...
guess i should use the time to study then. if only information would flow naturally into my brain like how music does, and never leaves.

i'll go get breakfast and then continue with that meaningless chunk of biology.
bluek.

yum

2011-06-18T00:38:00.000+08:00

sleep is my best friend.

-

2011-06-16T01:34:00.002+08:00

ineedhelp

2011-06-09T23:25:00.005+08:00

but i'm def not gay hehe,

officially a B2TY.

thingstodowhenmomgoesmental

2011-06-07T00:30:00.000+08:00

!!!

2011-06-02T23:05:00.002+08:00

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////F R U S T R A T I O N////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

comfort zone

2011-06-02T16:06:00.000+08:00

i really don't have eye-lashes... hope they'll grow as fast as my hair does, i'm sorry for plucking you..

middle

2011-05-29T14:49:00.001+08:00

June break:---- an i l l u s i o n of t i m e
everything will keep going while i stay still.

on a side note i'm aching all over after exercising on 10 or more gym equipments in 2 hours. thats what you get for skipping pe for a year and a half..
poor body. let me get you some food..

swell

2011-05-17T19:23:00.000+08:00

yeah i like spoiling my shirts.

day started great and then gradually got bad.. i don't even know how. i'm not being insensitive i just don't do great with sensitive people. they feel way too much i don't think its healthy.
it's only healthy when those are good feelings, but people tend to only notice the bad ones. so please, you, stop hatin' and complainin' and start lovin'.

because whatever you give comes right back at you.

"don't waste your youth growing up"

2011-05-16T22:24:00.000+08:00

Thats what everyone's doing.
wasting youth to plot for their perfect freakin' future. (i'm pretty sure the 30 year old me would tell myself right now to 'screw it and just have fun')

Hello, I am a the ultimato-procrastinator. I'm sure it can be seen as some sort of 'talent'?

and i'm not very good with words so i guess i had better get started with some chemistry that's due tomorrow instead of thinking of what else to say here.

Peace`

pppppppplosive

2011-05-15T12:27:00.000+08:00

Did a cover, Sunday morning by maroon 5, on facebook.
But it's private ;)

hellu

2011-05-08T18:38:00.000+08:00

I've been trying to draw...
but
naked
girl
doesn't
look
naked
enough.

I probably should be studying. But y'know, i'd rather not.
Oh yes. Interesting fact: I HAVE A THIRD EYE. NO NOT LITERALLY BUT YEAH THERE'S SOMETHING NEXT TO YOU. No? haha its there alright.

5:00PM

2011-04-27T19:33:00.002+08:00

I miss living in malaysia,

At 5PM my brothers and I will automatically transform into swim-suit warriors, wrap ourselves in towels and zoom down to the pool leaving our unfinished homework aside (I don't even know how we could just not give a shit about anything except to have fun). It was always really fun though, I remember swimming happily until I saw a FROG in the pool. Imagine us kids panicking in the water.. oh yes it wasn't just a frog, we found a massive lump of frog eggs somewhere under a rock. I still don't know how that's possible, hallucination maybe.

There was also this small water slide, non-stop up and down water splashin fun hehe. One time my brother came sliding down and losing his tooth in the process. I ripped my thumb nail once, but thats another story for another water slide in our home in penang..

Nowadays 5PM = nap time.
plus my brothers would be too busy playing video games to entertain me.

OK not necessarily true.
my bros are spazzes they do retarded things to entertain me all the time.
I just asked if anyone was nice enough to switch on the lights in my room for me just coz I was too lazy to walk over. And Adam got out of his room, walked all the way to mine.. to switch off the ceiling fan.

Ass.

can't think don't want to think

2011-04-25T18:45:00.000+08:00

(oursierra)

beautiful people with beautiful features and i have a pimple on my scalp.
that is all.

(L)

2011-04-09T23:29:00.001+08:00

How can I ever forget awesome old chinese songs.

2011-04-03T20:36:00.000+08:00

Haven't been able to sleep for days. Until today, everything is slowly getting to me, so very dead.
Sundays are honestly the most unproductive days eva, I get too lethargic to do anything at all. I can't list anything i've done today because they're insignificant shiz. (like singing in the bathroom for almost an hour before I decide to shower)
Gr. Why am I like that.
Yesterday I had tuition in the evening instead of the usual mornings, tutor apologised because he assumed teens like me go out on saturday nights. But I wasn't planning to go out :(. I could stay home for weeks if there's no need to head out. Imagine me after A's... chillin at home in my pj's/having a mini-concert in the bath/sleeping while people party all night.

geezcantwaitnomore

new sweater

2011-03-27T19:11:00.001+08:00

Just woke up from a 2 hour nap. I find it harder to get up from naps in the afternoon than to get up at 6AM for school.

Lazy Sunday tasks: Pack up the room, finish/start reading 'Amsterdam, download the OST of 'Morning Glory'(goodstuff go catch it)

and more goodyummystuffz.
Happy Sunday!

Faulty organs

2011-03-25T23:46:00.000+08:00

Are your eyes made to view the beauty of the world
or are they made to judge.
Do you gaze with love
or to glare to stab a heart.

mood

2011-03-18T20:24:00.000+08:00

N E R D

2011-03-12T23:26:00.001+08:00

Don't mind me, I just felt really accomplished.
Not used to wearing it though, I can literally see stars if I move my eyeballs too much.

Can't roll my eyes for the time being.

Fasssssssssst

2011-03-09T18:18:00.001+08:00

I just found this :O-worthy.

Been sleeping well nowadays, I even snoozed my alarm when it was time to get up (I'm an ultra-light sleeper, something wakes me and that's it. Sometimes even rain drops cause me insomnia).
I even had long continuous dreams.
Last night I was thrown into an oven by an evil person and she even heated it up. I didn't feel I was gonna burn and die though, I knew someone would save me. WEIRDASS NATHALIE.
I did came out alive, if you were wondering.
my dreams never make sense.

Time for some math chem shizz and I'm off to bed early.

What are eyebrows for?

2011-03-06T00:13:00.003+08:00

What are eyebrows for?

Answer here

[ to raise it at people..
fetishforshoess responded to you

to wiggle

walury responded to you

to trap em eyeshit
bonrhymeswith responded to you ]

12:36 AM fun. Teehee why are my fwens so funny.

munchin some pears

2011-03-05T22:41:00.000+08:00

My left eye-- something's wrong with it, but I'm not sure what yet. Maybe it's my contacts.. I'll have to go have them checked soon-ish. And then maybe get a pair of specs for home use, yeah ikr I wear my contacts 24/7. How ignorant can I get.

Home all day, as usual. Had tuition in the morning, chemistry-kills-me. Everyday I wish for some nerdy ghost to possess me till I finish my A levels. OK I kid the nerdy ghost, stay away from me. But I would'nt mind if you help me with some of my homework.. go ahead when I'm asleep, which is probably most of the time.

That's about it. Me struggling with school and a sick/dysfuctioning body. Or eye, in this case.
OH YES. I've been looking so sickly, my bio teacher recently commented that I remind her of Bella Swan. Yes that thing from twilight. Somebody pleaseeeeee paint me some colours, give me rainbows and unicorns, my life needs LIFE.

Till next time!

all or nothing

2011-03-02T23:42:00.000+08:00

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2011-02-13T18:36:00.001+08:00

I do nothing at home. N-O-T-H-I-N-G. If not for the growing piles of work after every week and the annoying due dates I wouldn't bother. I don't think anyone can enjoy doing absolutely nothing as much as I do, just 2 hours ago I was lying in bed watching my curtains fly with the wind and getting twirled into knots after being caught by the ceiling fan. So. Amusing. (definitely much more amusing than homework and tests to study for..)

Why can't the world just let me be.

The title was an attempt of drawing 'the sea' btw. Mainly because I'm drowning again, every sunday I drown. But I don't die.

fuzzywuzzy

2011-02-11T22:48:00.000+08:00

I want to save some happiness in a box and reuse them when I need it.

Broken Social Scene - Sweetest Kill

2011-02-10T14:17:00.000+08:00

(L)

note

2011-02-06T13:01:00.000+08:00

I'll have to remember this.

Nouvelle Vague - Just Can't Get Enough

2011-01-30T22:40:00.000+08:00

chirpchirp

2011-01-30T14:19:00.002+08:00

*:(

2011-01-26T14:36:00.000+08:00

I JUST KEEP FALLING SICK *&*&%^()

oh joy

2011-01-15T22:57:00.000+08:00

Yes hello, please forgive my ugly feet I don't really have much of a choice for it to be this ugly. hahahahah.
I absolutely LOVE the first picture btw, just hope that Jen doesn't mind being 'featured' THAT much in this space.. "I can't help it that everyone likes me.. *shrugs* "- Jennifer.

silly me

2011-01-06T21:10:00.000+08:00

note to self: stay true to yourself.
and don't die.

dizzy, I see black spots, go away.

Many things I want to get rid of, my cupboard, my desk, vibrating laptop, school.. I'd think of more but the black spots are blacking me out. I'll try and figure out what I want for 2011 later on, when my mind is working again.

Had a really weird dream a few days back when I was taking a nap in the afternoon, I promised myself not to tell anyone of the dream or it will not come true. I always believed in keeping dreams a secret so it will stay in me and maybe, it'll be real. Stupid logic. I hope being this vague doesn't let it still creep away..

..

I see clones everywhere.. everyone's being everyone else.
..and my thoughts are as incoherent as the writings on your bathroom wall.

stars

2010-12-31T01:55:00.001+08:00

I'm feeling drowsy and high after taking that flu tab. No reason to be here but I just wanna share this:

LOOK AT THE UNICORN A FEW POSTS DOWN, CAREFULLY...
Can you see it?
you would if you're a guy, cuz guys and girls have different set of eyeballs and i'm beggining to jibjabber and i should sleep before I kill that neighbours dog out of angst. you know i'm just kidding right... heh goodnight you.

wind blows fan

2010-12-26T17:49:00.001+08:00

I'm coming home
I'm coming home
Tell the world I'm coming home
Let the rain wash away all the pain from yesterday
I know my kingdom awaits and they've forgiven my mistakes
I'm coming home
I'm coming home
Tell the world that I'm coming home

guilt

2010-12-23T01:30:00.000+08:00

Good dreams please. x

pointless

2010-12-19T00:33:00.001+08:00

I've been perpetually hungry these few days, soon I'll turn in to a wobbly blob of fat. But then again everything I eat doesn't exactly help me grow (taller/wider), the nutrients go to my hair and nails (of all places..geez). Not good because I'll have to cut them every once in a while and once in a while is really troublesome for a bum like me. But I should be thankful, at least I'm not that much waste of a space.

So I guess I'll just eat all I want, as I've always been doing.

I tried being christmassy today, sang '12 days of christmas' while watching tv with my lil bro, he kept giving me looks of awe on how whiney the song is.. I reached the 11th day and died due to lack of breath. Not feeling very festive at all after that I must say.
Oh I also tried being a girly girl and went shopping with Jen at the flea today but we ended up with ZERO. Decided to have sushi instead, I LOVE SUSHI, NEXT TO RAMEN. Yes I'm very asian wheeee~ come let's have a chopstick fight..

Saggitarius

2010-12-16T17:56:00.000+08:00

Love Francisco.

I've decided to keep this place alive.

Everyone's looking foward to christmas, I'm not, it's just another day.. another day closer to the start of year 2011 and honestly, IMFREAKINOUT. So many things I wanna do, so many things I needa do.. I hate being alive sometimes. If only I could pause and replay a chosen part of my life like a GIF.

xx

2010-12-16T01:23:00.001+08:00

I've been doing that all my life without knowing.

psssssssssssssssssst

2010-12-03T23:18:00.001+08:00

I know this place is reeking of death. I know. I only come back when I feel like it and really, its rare because I HARDLY FEEL ANYTHING, emotionally/ physically. It's good and bad, but I'm changing nevertheless.

BUTBUTBUT had a reeeally good laugh today thanks to JEN the weirdo:

So I didn't sleep well last night, my brain was crowded with lotsa weird shit that I don't remember and when I think of weird shit I can't sleep. Finally dozed off and was awaken by her coming into my bedroom to use the toilet, SHE CAME IN AT 630AM TO USE MY TOILET. Why you ask? because the lights in hers weren't working. You'll think maybe she needed to pee real bad and was afraid of the dark... yeah thats what I thought, until I heard her scrubbing her undies. SHE CAME UP AT 630AM TO WASH HER UNDIES. I swear I wanted to barge in and kick her.
She didn't even go to school today.
So. Many. Questions.

And then just a few hours ago she came in to hang out (my room), and stepped on a banana (not the skin mind you..). I don't even know how to explain. She got off the bed, and her feet went right for it. of all places.. HAHAHAHHAHA it was too epic, she didn't even dare to look down at what she squashed. 'I thought I smashed a rat! or BRAINS!'
yknow I still can't stop laughing.
WHY WAS THE BANANA ON THE FLOOR ANYWAY?! It was lying nicely on the plate when I last saw it.. geezus.
SO. MANY. QUESTIONS.

ohnuuu better get to bed, swimming in the morn with the girls. Hope it doesn't rain.
S'later!

its stuck

2010-12-03T21:00:00.000+08:00

s'never been like that

2010-11-17T18:56:00.000+08:00

on repeat

where's my tear fixer

2010-11-15T00:09:00.000+08:00

"I've got to face it. I don't react the way I used to. I don't weep properly anymore. Something has changed inside me, as it has around me. The streets are deserted. There's scarcely anyone left in the cities, or the countryside, or the forests. The sky is clearer now, but still without colour. Years of endless wind have swept away the stench of mass graves. Some sights still upset me, others not. I seem to be on the verge of a sob, but nothing comes. I'll have to go and see the tear-fixer."

trying doesn't work in life

2010-11-10T18:53:00.001+08:00

Ate half a bag of popcorns while watching 'the social network' earlier, aaandd that was basically what I ate for the whole day. Its 647 now, time for dinz, hopefully my stomach isn't already filled with air because I'm still not feeling hungry. This is what happens during THE time of the month. I either get incredibly hungry or not feel the need to eat at all, it switches every alternate month.. How weird I am..

School tomorrow, all the best to me.
For now I'll just go get some food and fill my poor stomach. Ciaooooo.

design

2010-11-10T01:46:00.003+08:00

F a s c i n a t i n g.
If only I could make things real by drawing them out.. I can't wait to have my own house more than anything else! (its a loooooong wait)

Anyway the cramps are killun me, times when I hate being a female.. Almost wanted to watch a video of a lady giving birth, supposed to be gory and sick thru the comments though its more of a beautiful thing..yknow.. to be giving birth. Once again! Us poor women. I didn't watch it by the way, figured I'll get so freaked out I'll never want to get preggers EVER, and then my mom will cry and whine if I decide not to next time.. So, for the sake my future children (see the thought of being a mom did occur to me..) I shall not watch that. And while we're at it.. MUMMY YOU'RE SO BRAVE I LOVE YOU MOREMORE.

Right,she just came in and nagged at me for being awake at 2AM. She says since I'm having my period I'm already losing a lot of blood so I need sleep. Don't know how that links at all but oh well! Sleep it is.

guuuudnight peeps.

edit/
HAHAHAHA Guess what, google ads thinks I need tips on 'Getting pregnant FAST'.

wooweet

2010-11-09T23:45:00.000+08:00

awesome or what?

:I

2010-11-04T23:32:00.001+08:00

Meet up with mates and this is what you get:

Hilarious bunch of people. Daps back in Perth again! How fast. Can't wait to see her again..

So I'm supposed to tidy up my room and get rid of unwanted books/clothes/junks. AND THEN REVAMP MY ROOM TEEHEE. Gotta go get new furniture and holla new room! But uh, the cleaning part is a lil hard to get started on. Tomorrow i will! def. I swear upon my uh...ok I just will. And soon after, Jen is going to be living with me yay! She spoiled her reputation by crapping on msn while I was afk, my brother who was using my lappy saw everything. Something along the lines of 'Tell me why am I so pretty?' HAHAHAH but I forgot to save the conversation so I have no proof. She's still innocent. *ahem (I'm not lying!(im lying...))

So I've been thinking! a guitar or a new computer for my birthday..

SWEET DREAMS EVERYONE!

:(

2010-10-31T23:09:00.003+08:00

I'm sad.
I'm sad because my brothers love rolling around in my bed and making it so unbearably dirty that I have to dust it every minute.
I'm sad because my wardrobe is filled with old and boring clothes that I really don't know how to wear anymore.
I'm sad because my laptop is making a hell lot of noise(almost like a vibrator).
I'm sad because my room is in a mess and I'm too lazy to clean it.
I'm also sad because the mess is made by others and not me.
I'm sad because my mom scolded me for being in my room everyday(I really do not know where she wants me to be. The kitchen making sandwitches maybe..)
Oh and my mom didn't agree with instant noodles today, which made me terribly terribly sad.

Oh well.

On a totally unrelated topic.. You do not want to have more than 2 children. (because you'll most prolly end up loony)
A few days ago Poojs and I had conversations about mom's being a lil kuku when they get older. Its not just menopause okay it's additional if you have more than 2 kids. Stories she told me were hell funny and yet sad at the same time, oh we poor women left at home.. almost like a cage.. with annoying children.. and chores.. and you turn old and haggy. Ok I don't even know what I'm saying hahaha (turning loony soon)

Well I'm just saying.. Today I asked my mom if I can have instant noodles for teabreak and she screeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmeeeeeeeddddddd at me, afterwhich I said I won't have anything for teabreak then(feeling cool and rebellious). You think thats the end but noooooooo, she screamed again, dragged me back into the kitchen and forced me to eat something else. What in the world. She then continued to stare at me as I took a plain piece of bread and ran for my life. ...Ok I swear it sounded a little less lame in my head.

Before that I was lying in bed watching shows on my laptop and she barged in and shoved a cup into my face and asked me to drink. Scolding me on how I don't know how to take care of myself and she needs to come up and serve me. I KNOW HOW! There are like cups on my table which I JUST brought up to drink! She did not need to come shove another cup into my face!
Is there some sort of continuously-bringing-food-to-your-kids kind of syndrome? Cos I think my mom has it. Every half an hour my maid will come up with a plate of fruits/cups of juice/bread/other cups of juice/another kind of fruit, when its not even time for lunch or dinner or anything. I really don't know if it's good or bad.
OK ITS BAD! I'M SCARED! STOP BRINGING FOOD UP AND MAKING ME SEEM LIKE A BUM. PLUS I'M NOT EVEN HUNGRY!

I shall do that to her tomorrow. Bet she'll feel really happy.
Hello mummy if you see this (you had better not or at least act like you didn't because parents reading their childs blogs or wtv is just creepy and.. wrong..) let me be independent please tyvm <3.

Random post i read somewhere: Some guys father added him on facebook so he updated his status saying 'WTF' and his dad commented 'what is wtf?' and he replied 'Welcome to Facebook'. Genius.

Karaoke tomorrow. Finally. Goodnight you!

vhants

2010-10-13T16:07:00.000+08:00

j'adore!

2010-10-11T00:15:00.002+08:00

1 week of holidays before doom.
I'm just glad it's all over and now I have all the time and freedom!
wheeeee.
Jen stayed over for 2 days and we had lotsa lotsa lotsa fun doing absolutely nothing. Which is what i've been wanting to do since forever.

OH and I can't wait to shift to my new house!!!!!

Hows life people?

hate school

2010-09-27T00:12:00.001+08:00

I wish I had super brains and infinity space of memory. But all I remember are useless pointless things that nobody understands. Not math, not chem, definitely not bio facts. I really do not care about the things I'm studying, they just don't interest me. IM SO SORRY BUT I JUST CANT SEE THE WONDERS OF SCIENCE. They just complicate life and then try to solve it but end up complicating things even more. What losers.

HAHA really sorry I've just gone mad because I can't seem to remember the stuff I need to properly, they just slip away when I need them. Annoying things, stay where I put you damnit. Run away and you'll get lost in the universe, at least if you stay in my brain I can put you into good use to score A's. Don't try to make life difficult for me please?

Yeap, gone insane.
8th october come to momma.

my machinery

2010-09-18T01:03:00.000+08:00

I don’t know what my strengths are or what I’m supposed to do about them. But if I start thinking about these things in too much detail the whole thing gets scary. And if I get scared I can only think about myself. I become really self-centered, and without meaning to, I hurt people. So I’m not such a wonderful human being.
-Haruki Murakami

the way it turns

2010-09-12T00:53:00.000+08:00

Sometimes I look into the mirror trying to figure how it would be like to watch myself like how people do.
I can't watch myself.
Because I don't like being watched. At least not when I don't know what I'm doing, eg. rightnow. (i hope no one is..)

School in a day and exams in a few weeks.
I really really really reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaallyyyyyyyyyyyy HATE time.
I hate ANYTHING that controls me.

Which is why, this time, I will take control, which ever way things turn out.
Hope you're doing good (unlike me),
<3

happytomatoes

2010-09-07T22:02:00.001+08:00

Some things that made me H A P P Y recently.

pretty necklace I just bought
hangouts at my place (sushi making)
jewel's birthday celebration (with a Daphne standee)

I had to force myself to upload these pictures. Believe it or not.
Intensive mugging, hope it lasts.

Happy holidays people!

I'm back to being quirky

2010-08-31T20:40:00.002+08:00

If you've missed my face:

Or not!

you don't really care what people say

2010-08-22T15:17:00.000+08:00

Because pretty pictures make me melt and I don't have to care about anything else when I am looking at them.
I don't care that my heart is steel
I don't care that my feet hurts from wearing heels
I don't care if my brain is filled
I too don't care if you do get what I'm saying.
Because pretty pictures make me melt and I don't have to care about anything else when I am looking at them.

E S C A P E - E P A C S E

Lush

2010-08-15T21:34:00.000+08:00

Time passes so quickly it scares me.
Took a nap at 6pm wanting to wake up at 630pm but when I opened my eyes the sky was already dark. I suddenly felt really really :'(.

Don't you think 'lol' looks like a drowning man? Funny isn't it. It's as if no one bother's you're drowning, or you can't tell anyone that you are, because they are all drowning in their own sea of troubles why would anyone help anyone?
They can't even if they wanted.

I'm gonna sleep early because this is scaring me, and at least I'll be in another world when I'm dreaming. Doing and seeing things that don't make sense and never questioning it. Rather than constantly having to care if I'm doing right/good in reality.

Don't we all hate sundays.

pop the bubble

2010-08-12T22:11:00.001+08:00

I'm so so so so so weak. Been having fever on and off for 2 weeks now? and no I'm still not well. Went to the polyclinic to get a fake MC and realised I was having a real fever, the doctor went, "oh yeah youre still having a fever." I went " yeah, wait really??" So I'm thinking if i should go to school tomorrow, heh.

Been listening to her A LOT. Sucha beautiful voice! You should too if you haven't. Make's everyone else sound like.. idontknow..crows?
Talking about crows, MY BROTHER CAN"T STOP 'SINGING'. It's non-stop hits at home I tell ya, hits = you literally hitting your head against the wall.
Annoying.

Pooja says this girl in the vid reminds her of me, I'm proud, because she's so adorable ;) HAHA watch it:

Right? Thats my baby, btw. She was kidnapped.

(I think I kinda decided to skip school. Bahahaha)

killing

2010-08-10T00:11:00.000+08:00

The 'Long weekends' are so not enough.

I wanna quit school and do stupid stuff to waste my life away. Yes. And probably wake up in a hospital with a world record for doing something real stupid. I don't even wanna wake up tomorrow.

Why can't I control time?

Ugh I'm hungry, but the ghosts are all out by now looking for preys I don't think going to the kitchen to get food is a good idea. I am one hungry ghost... Better get to bed soon and wake up to reality AGAIN.

What a Yucks world this is.

out of boredom

2010-08-02T22:22:00.001+08:00

dreams

2010-08-01T19:06:00.001+08:00

BBM conver with Mabs,

Participants:
-------------
•N•a•t•h•a•l•i•e•, Mabel

Messages:
---------

Mabel: John mayer so funny
Mabel: "I just woke up from a dream about drinking water. When you get to live your dreams, your actual dreams are boring as shit."
•N•a•t•h•a•l•i•e•: Ahah funny meh
Mabel: Yah!
•N•a•t•h•a•l•i•e•: Lol
Mabel: Dreaming about drinking water?!?!?!
•N•a•t•h•a•l•i•e•: My dreams are never boring
Mabel: Cuz you're not living your dream
•N•a•t•h•a•l•i•e•: I will never live my dream
•N•a•t•h•a•l•i•e•: They are ridiculous
Mabel: You never know
•N•a•t•h•a•l•i•e•: You mean one day I'll eat my phone.
Mabel: HAHAHAHAHA

I just really hate the cold

2010-07-31T18:53:00.001+08:00

I'm sick. as if I don't look sick enough.

BoA(보아)_GAME_뮤직비디오(MusicVideo)

2010-07-25T00:17:00.000+08:00

Bloody hell

2010-07-24T23:56:00.002+08:00

Running up and down, in and out, looking for my black top. I got so frustrated I went up to my maid and asked if she ate it. She just laughed. Right after she found it and handed it to me. I still think she did.

My face's pretty screwed up right now. It's like a pimple plantation. I avoid mirrors just to be in denial. So Pooja, pulling me to the toilet in school makes me miserable but since we are married I guess I'll do it for ya. HEHE.
School's pretty fun despite my face, ccccuuuuuzzzzz I get to scare people. Nah, I kid, why would that be fun. It's fun when I do pooja favours by hinting some guy to add her on Facebook, everytime he's near I shout 'FACEBOOOOOOOOOOOOK'. As if he'll get it, wait 10 years.

I'm becoming really weak, skipping PE. Today, after running around looking for my top I was panting. Oh and this girl in school came up to me and Pooj asking us how we get out LT MC's. The thing is... we don't. We just look plain weak and sick all the time. But we gave her tips anyway, HAHA.

suckup to the doctor
look as druggish as possible
say you'll faint if you run
faint on the spot if you need to
if he/she make you go for blood tests
goodluck

Blood tests are retarded, they let you do all sorts of tests, each drawing one or two tubes of blood. I didn't use to have anaemia but now I do. Bet they were trying to get as much blood from me because imma blood type O.
Bloodyhell.(literally)

Okay enough of blood.

I watched a few episodes of 'Lie to me' and I really think its so traumatising to work or be with those people (expertise in body language and predominantly microexpressions). Imgine your mom having the ability to detect your lies, how sad is that. OR if you can tell if your parents are lying to you. Bet when you're a kid your parents told you funny lies for their own benefit.
Maybe some of you still believe them. (like Mabs)

I remember when I was young I wanted a lil sis real bad, (wanted to name her Grace, idk why don't ask me, at least it wasn't Barbie or something.) Mom told me she would make me one, with daddy.. Yeah I think you get it. They made me wait outside while they were at it. HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
I actually waited and knocked on the door every 5 minutes to ask if they were done. Bet they we're annoyed, Oh well that's what you get for lying! and instead of one cute little sister I now have 3 brothers. Grrreat.

So to be fair, I'm gonna think of awesome lies for my own kids..or yours.
Maybe I'll tell them that things in shopping malls are only for display and that I have a third eye at the back of my head.

HAHAHA Goodnight kids.
And yeah that monster is still living under your bed.

(L)

2010-07-17T23:00:00.010+08:00

I'm totally not supposed to be here.
Just wanted to say,
OMGBOA<3YOU

Ok second father nagging at me, BYE peeps.

say whut?

2010-07-10T19:18:00.000+08:00

Mom showed me and my bro a love letter she found while cleaning the house.
Don't ask me how it ended up in my house, lotsa creepy stuff happens anyway. No, I'm kidding.

But me and my bro read it and came up with with this theory that the person is gay. And because it's in chinese, my bro translated it into english, gave it some corny melody and made it into a very emotional song. I think we're freaks.

Adam: Yknow, I wanna have this kinda feeling.
Me: Mad, why!
Adam: So I can write awesome chinese compo's.

The point is, there is no point to this blog post.
Just another saturday spent at home with my freak family members. Awwwwww.

Take a shot

2010-07-02T15:39:00.000+08:00

Exams are over, temporarily.
I want to take nice pictures now that I'm free. But then again since when did I ever get anything done properly.

We'll see!
For now, eyecandies.

I don't even feel like trying anymore

2010-06-29T17:17:00.001+08:00

Felt that?
People think they kill trees by manufacturing paper, I think papers kill me.

One day I'll just pop like a bubble

2010-06-23T00:37:00.001+08:00

So tired these days my brain is in labour. And Rachel just told me 'there's no end to practicing', GREAT. NO END.
Why the hell did I put myself in such deep shit, and it just gets deeper until the shit evaporates/decomposes. Which will take forever and I can't breathe shit no more.

Sorry about talking shit (literally) but I don't feel awesome right now. Sometimes I just feel like living the moment and not think about what needs to be done afterwards. But plans are a need right? Or you'll be just useless thing(shit) living life with no goals/expectations.. But you know, If those didn't exist...
We'd all be happy peeps.

Nah no not everyone would be, but me.

Sometime's I wanna be a Goldfish,
Or a baby that never grows,
A freak,
A stone,
The Wind,
A Bubble.

Never Human.
I really think Life's some sort of punishment for us being the selfish sperm that didnt give way for the other sperms to get into the egg.
If I didn't exist, I wouldn't know I didn't exist, I wouldn't know whats 'I'. I would be nothing. But over here, everyone wants to be Something.

Stupid mabs.

2010-06-17T19:52:00.001+08:00

Hello peeps I DID NOT CREATE FORMSPRING IT WAS MABS!
*points at her

kinda obvious right?
who would say 'I created it on my own'
she's now in the toilet so im gonna finish this fast, bye.
I foresee 'my' formspring to be deadlier than ever anyway.

I created it on my own

2010-06-17T19:28:00.000+08:00

HI I JUST CREATED FORMSPRING http://www.formspring.me/nathalovesboa

mabel's forcing me to create formspring

2010-06-17T19:21:00.000+08:00

School-less mornings

2010-06-13T16:49:00.000+08:00

This morning around 10am my brother came in and pulled open the curtains saying 'RISE AND SHINE!'
He said my reaction shocked him so bad. 'I always see this scene in disney cartoons but your reaction was far from what a princess would do.' I'm pretty sure I screamed at him to shut it and asked him what's his freaking problem. Its funny how he expected me to rub my eyes and stretch and actually get up saying 'morning sir!'
He's lucky he wasn't close enough to get a kick from me.

This too shall go into all the funny memories I have with my brothers.

Oh well, I woke up feeling happy later on anyway.

Things that might spoil my mood:

waking up late (makes me feel guilty for wasting the day)
people leaving random stuff/rubbish in my room
people not knowing how to shut doors properly
messy surroundings
being in crowds
noise
0% originality
school
making me eat when I'm not hungry
plans
getting reminded of what is ahead of me

Things that make me exceptionally happy

singing/music
instant noodles
being home(which means holidays)
being home alone
taking good pictures
funny encounters/dreams
when I'm living in a dream

As for right now, I am home(not alone but oh well), singing to the song above and having no plans for the day, I am 9/10 gleeful. That one last point is me savouring a bowl of instant noodles, no luck today though, mom cooked fried noodles.